20 Modern Dating Definitions Singles Should Know
Dating Definitions – Navigating dating in the modern age can be daunting. From texting etiquette to when it’s okay to get intimate, there are so many different standards.
In an attempt to make the process easier, Business Insider has put together 20 Modern Dating Definitions Singles Should Know. They’ll help you avoid some of the pitfalls that plague modern dating.
Locating
In a world dominated by mobile dating apps, it’s easy to forget that there was once a time when meeting someone offline required more than a nifty new smartphone. As a result, the lockdown has brought about some exciting changes in how we date – most notably the ‘locating’ trend that is taking centre stage.
Locating is the act of defining your location settings on your phone or tablet to include people within an easy walk, drive or bus ride of your house. This sounds boring, but it’s a smart move that will make you feel safe on a first date. As such, it’s one of the most popular modern dating fads. For example, a study by women-first dating app Bumble found that 25% of its users are opting to avoid the hassle of travelling to and from their prospective matches. This is aided by the advent of ‘locating’, which uses GPS technology to locate potential dates. And you can do it all in one go, thanks to the ‘location syncing’ feature of most smartphones.
Love Bombing
Love bombing is a chilling tactic that’s used by narcissists, abusers and con artists. It’s a sneaky form of manipulation, so paying attention to warning signs is essential.
A love bomber might shower you with gifts, declare their undying love or offer endless compliments in a brief period. This is a big red flag and could be a sign that they aren’t actually in love with you.
They may also push you to move in together too soon, which can be a sign of emotional abuse. Often, they’re trying to infiltrate your life and get control over you, says licensed therapist Sasha Jackson, LCSW.
It’s normal for new relationships to go through some hiccups in the beginning, but it’s a good idea to set healthy boundaries from the start. Otherwise, it can become difficult to separate an abusive relationship from a toxic one later on.
Once you’re in a relationship with a love bomber, it’s common for them to gaslight you and make you doubt yourself. They will manipulate your thoughts and emotions and may even use physical violence or threats against you to get what they want from you.
They can also isolate you from your family and friends to increase their control. This can result in depression and anxiety as they try to exert their power over you. It’s best to seek professional help for this type of relationship if it continues beyond a few months or starts to impact your mental health. You can also talk to a friend or family member who can support you in maintaining your confidence and self-esteem. There are plenty of resources online and in your local area to help you.
Flashpanner
The modern dating world can feel like a minefield, and it pays to be well-versed with the latest acronyms and lingo. The following 12 months are set to see the rise of terms such as ‘bamboozling’ and ‘flash-panning’, so singles should make sure they’re prepared.
A flash panner is someone who is addicted to that exciting start to a relationship – the honeymoon phase – but can’t handle the tricky bits that might come after, aka making a commitment. So they’ll bail on you when it comes to things like meeting their parents or posting an Instagram photo captioned ‘this one’.
These are all examples of something a ‘Flashpanner’ will never be able to commit to, so if you find yourself spotting this trend in your dating life, it’s time to take action. They aren’t necessarily bad, but they can also be downright creepy – so if you’re worried that this might be the guy or girl for you, it’s best to stay away from them.
Having said that, if you’ve ever dated someone who went in too fast and then cooled off or even ghosted you after they realised the spark wasn’t there anymore, it could be worth considering. Just be careful, and don’t let their sexy texts linger on in your inbox – as they may be onto someone else before you know it.
There are a few other modern dating definitions that you should be aware of if you’re looking for love, so remember to read this handy guide. It’s also worth taking note of some of the dating lingo that you might be unfamiliar with, so you can recognise the signs that a person isn’t right for you.
FODA
FODA, or the fear of dating again, is a new dating term that is being used to describe the hesitation many singles are feeling as they get back out on the dating scene. It is a combination of the anxiety-provoking factor of dating in the middle of a pandemic and the romantic ambivalence that most singles feel about relationships.
Victoria Pla, a 24-year-old copywriter from New York City, recently told TMRW that her FODA has come into play as she slowed down her approach to approaching people in real life. She’s opted to go on a few dates online, but she said she hasn’t been able to get past the feeling that she’s not getting back in the game.
“It’s just such a mixed bag of emotions,” she said. But she doesn’t want to give up on meeting someone in person just yet, because it is a great way to connect with people.
The good news is that many of those who are afflicted with FODA is also taking steps to invest in their mental health. Nearly a third of Hinge users reported seeing a therapist, while another one in three have tried to take control of their dating habits by making sure they’re taking breaks when they need them and giving themselves plenty of time to rest and recover from the stress.
It’s essential to keep in mind that FODA is only one of the modern dating definitions singles should know to ensure they’re not wasting their time on someone who isn’t compatible with them. Whether you’re hesitant to date or looking to get over your FODA, this guide will give you the tools you need to find a match that is truly compatible with your needs and desires.
Freckles
Freckles are harmless flat spots that appear when skin cells produce extra melanin, a pigment that helps protect your skin from sun damage. People with fair skin are more likely to get freckles, and they usually fade or disappear as you age.
Genetics play a significant role in freckle development as well. A variant of the MC1R gene gives people a natural tendency to develop freckles.
The amount of melanin your body produces and the distribution of your melanocytes also affect the likelihood of developing freckles. If your melanocytes are distributed evenly, you’ll have an even layer of melanin, reducing the risk of developing freckles and sunspots.
But, if your melanocytes cluster in a weird way, you’re more likely to develop freckles. According to Rachel Maiman, MD, a dermatologist in New York City, this is because you don’t have an evenly distributed level of melanin.
Another type of skin spot, known as a solar lentigines, is caused by frequent and prolonged sun exposure over the course of years. They’re more common in people with light skin tones and blond or red hair, but they can also occur in other people.
If you notice a new freckle or one that gets darker, it’s best to see a dermatologist for an evaluation. They can help you make sure that your freckle isn’t a sign of an abnormal mole or a sign of skin cancer, says Nada Elbuluk, MD, a dermatologist at Keck Medicine of USC.
